by rick grant rickgrant01@comcast.net
Spring has sprung, and the dog days of summer are soon upon us. It’s a time when Floridians seek shelter in air-conditioned buildings, homes and cars. Traditionally, movie theaters have been a haven for people who enjoy films in the cool comfort of the megaplexes. It’s as natural as ice cream, iced-tea and cold beer for those 90-degree-plus days and nights.
For movie producers, the summer months mean sure-thing blockbusters, which translate into sequels of already established franchises. It’s a time to make up losses from the Oscar-worthy product that didn’t necessarily bring in big bucks. Of course, for filmdom’s moguls, the term “sure thing” is ambiguous. Making movies is still a crapshoot. Ask Harvey Weinstein, who was shocked by the disappointing box office revenues for Grindhouse’s opening weekend.
So, this summer we can expect franchise sequels such as Spiderman 3, Shrek the Third, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End and yes, Oceans 13 among the big studio releases. Throw in another Fantastic Four and the long anticipated Evan Almighty, the sequel to Bruce Almighty starring Steve Carell, and the bean counters in Hollywood are getting aroused by the possibilities. When the dust clears, who knows what movie will emerge as the summer box office winner.
May rushes in like a hurricane with Spiderman 3, opening on May 4th. The man in tights is back, with Tobey Maguire once again starring as Spidey with Kirsten Dunst as his on-again-off-again girlfriend. In this episode, Peter Parker has finally managed to accept his double life as a regular guy who morphs into a superhero. This time, that darn suit turns black and evil, giving Spidey enhanced powers that he struggles to control. As Peter becomes more confident and vengeful, he neglects his friends and supporters, especially his girlfriend. Now Peter is at war with both sides of his superhero personality. It’s the old good-versus-evil scenario.
On May 11th, Georgia Rule opens with a stellar cast, including Jane Fonda, Lindsay Lohan, Felicity Huffman, Dermot Mulroney, Cary Elwes, and Garrett Hedland. Directed by Garry Marshall, three generations of top actresses unite and it set off long buried conflicts Rebellious young actress Rachel (Lohan) screams, swears, drinks and is uncontrollable. Let’s just say the role is not a stretch for Lohan to play.
That loveable green ogre is back with the voice of Mike Myers in Shrek the Third. This is one animated comedy of which we just can’t get enough, with Eddie Murphy reprising his role as Donkey and the rest of the gang returning for more hilarious shenanigans. When Shrek marries Princess Fiona, his father-in-law, King Harold of Far, Far Away falls ill. It’s up to Shrek to find a suitable heir or he will be forced to give up his beloved swamp for the throne. Shrek recruits Donkey and Puss in Boots for the new quest to bring back the rightful heir to the throne. On this quest, there are more dangers than Donkey can shake his tail at, and he and Puss face many obstacles.
More May madness comes on May 25th when Pirates of the Caribbean: At Worlds End opens with Gore Verbinski directing and Johnny Depp starring with the rest of the cast from the other sequels returning. As long as this franchise sets new box office records, we can expect Pirates to go on to number 10 or higher. In this episode, Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) and Elizabeth Swann (Keira Knightly) are allied with Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush) in a desperate quest to free Captain Jack Sparrow (Depp) from his mind-bending trap in Davy Jones’ locker. Meanwhile, the terrifying ghost ship, the Flying Dutchman is now under the control of the East India Trading Company and is wreaking havoc across the Seven Seas.
Think The 40 Year Old Virgin with writer/director Judd Apatow at the helm of Knocked Up, featuring the same style of comedy about the consequences of a one-night stand. Scheduled for a June 1st release, Katherine Heigl (Grey’s Anatomy) plays a virgin who can’t believe she’s pregnant after her first sexual encounter. Allison (Heigl) is a 24-year-old entertainment journalist on the fast track, but when she engages in a drunken one-nighter with slacker Ben Stone, her worst fear comes true.
When George Clooney and Steven Soderbergh need money to fund indie projects for their Section Eight Production Company, they make another Oceans picture. This third episode opens June 8, with the united the cast from 11 and 12. In the new sequel, Al Pacino and Ellen Barkin join the cast in the latest caper.
Also on June 8, the wacky animated feature Surf’s Up opens with a star-studded cast of voices. The story is based on the outrageous assumption that penguins invented surfing. The movie features a Penguin World Surfing Championship mockumentary.
Just when you thought it was safe to walk the streets, on June 15th the Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer premieres. In this story, the Fantastic Four meet their greatest challenge yet, the Silver Surfer, who races around the globe wreaking havoc. They must unravel the mystery of the Silver Surfer and confront the surprising return of their mortal enemy, Dr. Doom.
On June 22nd, the much anticipated and ballyhooed sequel to Bruce Almighty, Evan Almighty, starring Steve Carell opens. Evan gets tapped to be God and build an ark. In this story, Evan is elected to congress and consequently leaves Buffalo to move to Northern Virginia. There, Evan is visited by God (Morgan Freeman) who commands him to build an ark. But Evan’s befuddled wife (Lauren Graham) and kids think dad has gone bonkers. The expectations are high for this film with its cost overruns and other problems plaguing the shoot.
Also on June 22nd DOA: Dead or Alive premieres. The action scenario is based on a video game, Dead or Alive. It features an ensemble cast starring Devon Aoki, Sarah Carter, Natassia Malthe and Matthew Marsden with Jaime Pressly and Eric Roberts.
The film version of Mariane Pearl’s memoir, A Mighty Heart, premieres June 22. The docudrama chronicles the story of her husband Danny Pearl, a Wall Street Journal reporter. It explains Danny’s (Dan Futterman) reasons for being in Karachi, Pakistan, covering his abduction and the intense effort by his wife Mariane (Angelina Jolie) to find him during the weeks following his disappearance and his eventual murder by terrorists.
Just when you felt nostalgic about the Die Hard franchise and crave to see Bruce Willis in a dirty tank top, some meth-head at 20th Century Fox said, ‘Hey, let’s make another Die Hard.’ So, Live Free or Die Hard was greenlighted and the film was shot, due to open on June 29th. Harkening back to September 11th in this episode, an attack on the United States computer infrastructure begins to shut down the entire nation. The mysterious mastermind behind the shattering scheme has figured out how to hack into the nation’s most guarded systems. Enter John McClane, an old-school analogue type of guy ready to save the nation from this evil terrorist.
Fittingly, from the Mouse on June 29th, Ratatouille premieres. This animated feature stars a rat name Remy, who dreams of becoming a great chef despite his family’s wishes and the obvious problem of being a rat in a rodent-phobic profession. When Remy goes to Paris, he finds himself ideally situated beneath a restaurant made famous by his culinary hero, Auguste Gusteau.
Aliens make Earth the final battleground in Transformers on July 4th. As the forces of evil seek the key to ultimate power, earth’s last chance for survival is in the hands of young Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf).
Also on July 4th, License to Wed opens with John Krasinski starring as Ben Murphy, who is engaged to Sadie Jones (Mandy Moore). She is hoping for a wedding at a family church, but the church has only one wedding slot available in the next two years. Its pastor, Reverend Frank (Robin Williams) won’t bless Ben and Sadie’s union until they pass his marriage prep course.
On July 13th, Daniel Radcliffe returns from his nude appearance in a play as an older, wiser Harry Potter in the latest series installment, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. It’s Harry’s fifth year of study at Hogwarts, and he discovers that much of the wizard community has been denied the truth about his recent encounter with the evil Lord Voldemort.
John Travolta in drag? Yes, the film version of Hairspray premieres July 20th with Michelle Pfeiffer, Christopher Walken, and Queen Latifah. Based on John Water’s 1988 cult classic about star-struck teenagers in a local Baltimore dance show.
Also on July 20th, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry opens starring Adam Sandler and Kevin James as two straight guys who stumble down the aisle with the best of intentions. Chuck (Sandler) and Larry (James) are coupled when a grateful Chuck owes Larry for saving his life in a fire. Larry calls in a favor big time when civic red tape prevents him from naming his own two kids as his life insurance beneficiaries. All Chuck has to do is claim to be Larry’s domestic partner on some city forms. Yeah, no one will ever know.
There will be No Reservations on July 27th. Master chef Kate Armstrong (Catherine Zeta-Jones) lives her life like she runs her kitchen at a trendy Manhattan eatery -- with a no-nonsense intensity that both captivates and intimidates everyone around her. Kate’s emotional well-being is tested when she inherits her nine-year old niece Zoe (Abigail Breslin) while contending with a brash new sous-chef (Aaron Eckhart) who joins her staff.
D’oh! Yes, The Simpson’s Movie premieres on July 27th with the whole gang of voice-over actors including Matt Groening, James L. Brooks, Nancy Cartwright, Hank Azaria, Harry Shearer, and Albert Brooks. Trust this talented group to come up with hilarious comedic situations for a feature movie.
August comes in with another big sequel, The Bourne Ultimatum. Opening August 3rd, it stars Matt Damon in his third performance as assassin Jason Bourne. This is the follow-up to 2002’s The Bourne Identity, and 2004’s The Bourne Supremacy, as the previous two blockbusters earned over $500 million at the global box office. Acclaimed filmmaker Paul Greengrass (United 93) helmed this third episode of the franchise. Now, Jason will hunt down his past in order to find his future. He must travel from Moscow, Paris, Madrid, London, Tangiers, and New York City as he continues his quest to find the real Jason Bourne, while trying to avoid a legion of people who want him dead.
Also on August 3rd, Hot Rod premieres. It’s the story of stuntman Rod Taylor who is preparing for the jump of his life to clear fifteen buses to raise money for his abusive stepfather’s lifesaving operation. Along with Walt Disney’s Underdog.
On August 10th, Daddy Day Care 2 premieres. It is a sequel to the Eddie Murphy comedy set in a summer day camp with Cuba Gooding Jr. and Steve Zahn. It’s a camp caper.
Rush Hour 3 opens on August 10th as well. This is the third episode in the series with Chris Tucker after a six-year absence with co-star Jackie Chan and director Brett Ratner. The two Kung Fu LAPD detectives travel to Paris to battle a Chinese organized crime family, the Triads. Different city, same Kung Fu fooy!
Again a graphic novel is used as script material for a major film. Stardust premieres on August 10th, based on the graphic novel by Neil Gaiman and Charles Vess. The adventure begins in an English village and ends up in places that exist only in an imaginary world.
The Invasion opens on August 17th. It tells the story of a mysterious epidemic that alters the behavior of human beings. When a Washington D.C. psychiatrist (Nicole Kidman) discovers the epidemic’s origins are extraterrestrial, she must fight to protect her son, who holds the key to stopping the escalating invasion.
Also on August 17th, Super Bad premieres. The story revolves around two co-dependent high school seniors who set out to score alcohol for a party, believing that girls will then hookup with them and they will be ready for college. But as the night grows more chaotic, overcoming their separation anxiety becomes a greater challenge than getting girls.
It’s sure to be a summer season of varied and proven characters on the big screen. So get ready for popcorn overload while relaxing in front of the giant silver screen.
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